Cultural Relativity
by Cariel
Summary: Newly Knighted Ferus and Anakin are sent on a mission to convince a planet to aid the Republic's cause. However, things go awry and in spite of the duo's efforts, they end up making many mistakes.


A/N: A ficlet for Betareject!

**Cultural Relativity**

The Jedi Order was incredibly impressed with Anakin and Ferus's progress under the tutelage of their masters. The pair were advanced through their trials and knighted together at the same ceremony. Anakin was surprised that his rival was actually not that bad, even if they didn't get along or agree on things very often. After a time, they became friends due to a mutual understanding. It wasn't long before Ferus and Anakin were assigned to work on missions together.

The first assignment involved a mission to a mid-rim planet that Ferus had never been to before. Ferus only agreed to let Anakin pilot the ship because he knew he wouldn't hear the end of it. He was a little nervous being on his first assignment without his master and this made him react gruffly to anything Anakin had to say.

This made Anakin's mood sour and he refused to talk to him until they landed.

The inhabitants of the planet had a very different culture from that of the Jedi Order, let alone that of Coruscant in general. After a very long period of waiting in the royal palace, outside of a grand chamber, they were finally admitted. The entire royal family sat on their thrones, dressed in garbs that would make even the most risqué club goers of Coruscant's entertainment district blush. Ferus's eyes were especially drawn to one of the daughters, but he had to avert his eyes, blushing, lest his body betray him. Anakin, thankfully, didn't seem to notice, or so Ferus thought.

At the conclusion of their meeting, the emperor of the planet informed them that they would have to take time before making their decision in regards to what they would and wouldn't give to the Republic to aid in the war effort. Part of the condition relied on the Jedi participating in their festivities, for they were currently in the midst of celebrating a religious festival. Neither of the Jedi were aware that in fact the festivities were a week long which meant they would have to remain there _and_ participate for the entire week.

Some scantily clad servants took the Jedi to a vast room that had large pools of water. 'These are for bathing,' they said.

Ferus gulped at the sight of four or five young women about their age undressing and laughing as they slipped into the water. 'We have to go in there?' he asked Anakin.

'Don't ask me,' Anakin replied.

The servants then began to work on undressing the Jedi. Anakin's eyes bugged out of his skull. 'I can do it myself—'

'Don't be rude,' Ferus replied curtly to his friend. 'We have to respect their culture or else this deal won't work in our favour.' His voice wavered slightly as one of the servants began taking off his trousers.

Anakin gave in and the let the servant finish the job.

Neither of the teenagers were embarrassed about their body, but this was the first time they had to be naked in front of people they didn't know, especially young women they didn't know. If it were in the Jedi Temple going for a swim or showering afterwards, it wouldn't have been such a big deal. Ferus tried to pretend like it didn't bother him, but once they got in the water and the girls were playing around nearby, he felt very uncomfortable.

But if he thought this made him uncomfortable, the worst was yet to come.

After their Ibath/i, the two Jedi were ushered into another room, one filled with various flowers and burning oils. They were dressed by another group of servants in garbs befitting a holy man or woman on their planet. Ferus longed to put his Jedi uniform on, but had to remind himself that this was their culture and they needed to respect it.

It was now evening and the festivities were underway. They watched the men and women dancing, drinking, and carousing. Ferus was glad that he wasn't here alone, lest he have to remain awkwardly observing on his own. At least he wasn't the only one not participating. That was until Ferus looked to his right and found that Anakin was nowhere to be found. He looked around and tried to sense Anakin, but before he had a chance to search for very long, the daughter of the emperor approached him with a drink in hand.

'No, thank you,' he said. 'I'm—'

'It would be rude to refuse a glass raised in the offer of friendship,' the young woman replied, smiling at him.

Embarrassed and not wanting to offend, he apologised and received the glass. He mimicked her as s she raised her glass and pretended to take a sip.

'I noticed you haven't joined in the dancing,' she said, slipping her hand into his.

Uncomfortable, Ferus admitted, 'I'm not familiar with the style or customs of your people. I wouldn't want to cause offence because of my inability to participate properly.'

The young woman laughed and assured him he wouldn't. 'But you have to finish your drink first.'

Ferus frowned momentarily. He didn't have a choice. He drank the glass until there wasn't a drop left and allowed her to lead him over to the other dancers.

It wasn't long before he was having a few more glasses and landing flat on his face.

When Ferus came to, he was in another unfamiliar room instead of outside with the other guests. The room was dimly lit with spiritual candles and the scent of flowers bewitched his senses. He spotted Anakin on the side of the room inhaling something given to him by one of the royal daughters.

"FERUS!' he shouted and raced over to his friend. 'You have to try this stuff it's AMAZING!'

Ferus was confused and just did as he was told. The royal young ladies giggled and encouraged him. Who was he to refuse a lady's request? 'All right…'

**Five minutes later…**

'THE WALLS ARE MOVING! ANAKIN! LOOK OH MY—OH FORCE—' Ferus shouted as he stood up and wobbled back and forth, trying to reach out and touch the walls.

'I KNOW! IT'S ALL DIFFERENT COLOURS TOO!' Anakin replied enthusiastically.

Drums resounded outside the room as the celebrations took a more amorous turn, but for the two Jedi Knights, they believed they were under attack. Their experience in the war caused them to believe in their drugged state that the whole building was going to collapse.

'Anakin! We're going to die! We don't have anything to protect us—our lightsabers!' Ferus shouted in concern. He attempted to create a fort with a table, crashing it over onto it's side.

'Wait—' Anakin said, but it was too late, the candles lit the cloths on fire.

The young women screamed and took some of the ceremonial water to douse the flames.

'AHHH!!' Ferus shouted when he saw that his own minimal garbs were on fire. He tried to put it out by blowing on it, but it didn't work. 'HELP!!'

'FERUS!' Anakin shouted, grabbing another bowl and tossing it on Ferus, but it wasn't water. Instead, it was oil. He shrieked as the fire increased and leapt onto his own clothes.

The two Jedi jumped around trying to get the fire out until the royal daughters and their servants drenched them in water.

Now looking like drowned rats, they came to their senses and examined the remnants of their burnt clothing. Looking at each other, they laughed.

'Darra's going to be furious with you,' Anakin laughed.

'Why? I didn't do anything wrong!'

'Umm…' Anakin pointed to Ferus's head.

Ferus reached up and felt his head. His eyes widened in shock and shame. Half of his hair was burnt off. 'Anakin! This is al your fault!'

'My fault? How is this my fault?' Anakin argued.

A few verbal exchanges later, the two were wrestling, trying to beat each other up.

Unaware of their surroundings, the two fought their way into the middle of the royal bedchambers. The emperor and empress gasped in shock as they were getting ready for bed after a long evening of entertaining their guests.

'What in the name of Yeiffera are you two doing?!' the empress demanded.

The two Jedi stopped immediately and looked at the royals in shock and embarrassment. 'Um…'

'Er…'

'We…'

'Nothing!' Anakin replied.

Ferus grabbed Anakin by the shoulders. 'We were just leaving!'

'Yeah!' Anakin replied as they rushed out of the bedchamber.

'See I told you this was your fault!' Ferus shouted when they were outside.

'It was not!' Anakin replied.

'Gentlemen?'

They turned around to see the emperor standing there. 'You might want to change your clothes—showing your backside to royalty is a sign of disrespect.'

It was then that they realised the fire had also burnt a hole in their trousers.

Embarrassed beyond belief, Ferus and Anakin's cheeks reddened as they clasped their hands over the burnt area and backed away down the hall so as not to further offend the king.

It seemed no matter how hard the pair attempted to please the royal family, they inevitable ended up offended them in the end.

Thankfully the offence was not taken to heart and the Jedi returned to Coruscant, successful in the completion of their mission.

**The End**


End file.
